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Stand down: Back to defcon 5 status

Double murder? Two people show up dead 3 doors down and everyone jumps on the fear mongering bandwagon. According to the coroner, both were due to natural causes. And that can only mean one thing:

Conspiracy.

You remember, the gov and I disagree on what happen to the flight over PA on 9/11 (I say we shot it down, Gov says heros forced her down).

So here are my top 5 theories on what the heck happened down the street:
  1. Aliens. They must have seen something they should not have.
  2. Drugs. They both OD'd. One worked at a tire place, I know they smuggle drugs in tires from Mexico.
  3. They were spying on me. They were CIA deep cover operatives and obviously, their cover was blown.
  4. Lovers spat.
  5. Natural causes. Not a cop out, they were given drugs by aliens working for the CIA agent that was involved with them in a love triangle. These drugs are untraceable (like EPO) and appear as if they died from natural causes. (if you are not paying attention, it uses all 5 of my theories in one).
So the news crews swarmed the hood, trying to get a local response to the horror. I told Melissa I was going to don the super suit and stand on the roof, consoling citizens below and announcing that I am the new protector of the neighboor hood. I figured it would get me 15 minutes of fame and quite possibly some time in an institution.

Then there is the embarassing part of asking the camera man for help in getting me off my roof.

In other news, I've decided to don the super suit when Reagan starts bringing home male suitors. The mix of fear (it is a muscle suit) and insanity ("uh Reagan, why is your dad wearing a mask?) should keep her just a little more safe. It is that or get tatooed up.

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