If you know my Dad, you know he's had this coming

OK, I've been nice and haven't picked on the old man as of late. He said he couldn't handle the stress of being my whipping boy, so I laid off.

But now he has gone to far. He's become a photo critic. And I don't like being judged about my photos any more than I do about my writing.

You see, he bought a wireless digital picture frame for Mom and gave us access to send photos to it anytime we like. So while resisting the temptation to send him porn and candids of my rear end, I sent some of the photos I've made here.

But then I get a call from him telling me I've been censored. It seems the image of him with the "bush drowns kittens" is too offensive for the people who might view it. Did I mention the picture frame lives in their bedroom? Makes you wonder what kind of place they are running if lots of strangers are in their bedroom. Whoops. I retract the question and ask that it be stricken from the record.

So, why the censorship? Is the bad photoshop job? The dog tags dangling wildly? Is it the stance of Bush on drowning kittens? I have not a clue.

So, starting today, I am taking requests of what to photoshop in on Dad's chest in the photo. Vote for one of the following or submit your own:

• Bush may or may not drown kittens.
• I have no knowledge that Bush does not drown kittens.
• Bush drowns puppies.
• I have it on good authority the next elected president will, at times, most likely drown kittens.
• Bush hits kittens with shovels.
• Bush probably doesn't drown any small animals.
• Bush clubs seals.
• Kittens want to drown Bush.

or yours:
The winner will get their image poorly photoshopped by yours truly. Woo Hoo!