There are few things in parenting, I've found, that feels right. Sorry kids if you are reading this. The truth is I've been winging it. Hands up if you're surprised? No one? Fine.
It was almost sunset on Labor Day when I asked Ian, "do you want to go throw the ball around?" He said yes and we had a nice father-son toss out in the street and backyard. It felt great to have a stick in my hand and truth be told, my skills are getting rusty.
So we're in the back yard shooting and one of mine goes wide of the mark and hits our fence. Ian points to our neighbors shed and says, mine went a little higher this week. Upon inspection, I realize he's pointing to the window. It's broken.
It was broken by a lacrosse ball. He won't tell me, but I picture it like this: shot goes wide, he looks around to see who heard and off he runs into the house. He decides he'll tell me when "the time is right." Of course, the time never seems right.
He and I have a quick talk and decide we've got to come clean. His eyes are welling up, despite his public speaking skills, he's not ready to confront someone on his own, and I get that. So I offer to go with him to speak to our neighbor. He and I hatch a plan to clean up the window and fix it.
He's nervous on the walk over, far more than he needs to be. He's embarrassed and you can see in his eyes he feels horrible about the whole thing and just wants it to stop. The neighbor invites us in and we sit and tell her we've got a problem.
I break the ice and then pass it to Ian. He talks quickly. I know it's the nerves. His eyes are welling up again. It's then that neighbor catches my eyes and realizes this is one of those teaching moments. She doesn't care about the window but she's willing to play along and let us fix it. We part laughing and with thanks.
The walk home is far happier. Ian has a bounce in his step again and a smile on his face. Something tells me a weight was lifted off his shoulders.
I can't speak for Ian but this was one of those good parenting moments that they ought to hand out awards for. I played it well as did Ian. I think this will be one of those things he remembers well into adulthood and I suspect I will too.
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