Meet the Mighty Parallelogram

Ian Wins the Pine Wood Derby!!!

OK, "wins" may not be entirely accurate. He didn't "win" in the overall since of the word. And really, as long as we are on the topic, we are not talking about Ian. We are talking about me.

Ian's car, dubbed the Mighty Parallelogram (by me), didn't finish last. Which in my book and the total design aim of the car, means we won. The car was a total success. Ian actually took 3rd place overall, the Mighty Parallelogram finished first twice, finished 2nd 3 times. Awesome stuff. He was floored.

But really, it was me that was floored. I was the Dad who was embarrassed at my woodworking skills to pull out a car with all straight edges. I was the Dad who was overweight at the night before weigh in (talking about the car here folks) and was still overweight the day of.

Yes, I was off in a corner with some car keys trying to take off 0.2 ounces to make the car legal. Sweat keeps stinging my eyes as I whittle the car down. Ian looks up at me with tear filled eyes and says, "I can't race, can I Dad?" I worked with renewed zeal and wear the keys to the bone, and just met the deadline with a car that weight spot-on 5.0 oz.

As I am sawing away with the key, I noticed I had glued the axles in crooked. A bend and cracking noise followed and they were quasi straight. I am a perfectionist, what can I say?

Other Dads had cars that actually looked like cars, less like the block of wood we started with. Fenders, beveled edges, sanding, paint fades etc. Clearly these guys have serious woodworking tools and waay too much free time. Mine had sharp edges, and a rather bitchin' rally strip paint job (ian's idea).

That or they actually have some talent. I try to remember back to my Pine Wood Derby racer and can't remember what it looked like. I know my Dad helped me make it and it probably rocked.

Ian's Mighty Parrallelogram didn't look mighty at all. In fact, it looked more like he was cheated by a dad that is really good at computer stuff. But Ian didn't care. In fact, he was thrilled we got 3rd. There were probably at least 15 other cars.

Ian and I did everything on this car together, from him on one end of the wood saw and me on the other to sanding to painting (and getting paint all over himself). We did it together and that made it all worthwhile.

Oh, no I didn't fail high school geometry. This is about as close to a parallelogram as I am capable of crafting. Reagan was thrilled to be a fan during her grumpy Saturday...